Category Archives: Sexual normativity

Oh the stars that you can earn!

The “gold star asexual” (or “unassailable asexual”) is a person who has just those qualities so that no one could possibly question that they are most definitely really asexual, and certainly not broken or in denial.  Many of us feel … Continue reading

Posted in Sexual normativity | 7 Comments

“But what about The Sex?”: asexuality, relationships, and the metaphorical cake

Recently there have been a number of articles in the media about asexual folks in relationships.  This is great!  Maybe we’re finally moving past the “wow, these people exist, how weird is that” articles!  What isn’t so great is that, … Continue reading

Posted in Misconceptions, Relationships, Sexual normativity | 20 Comments

Asexuality and The Sexual Imperative : An Interview with Ela Przybylo (Part 1)

Hi Ela, Can you introduce yourself and say a few words about your work? My name is Ela Przybylo and I am a feminist researcher based in Canada. For the past several years I have been interested in exploring asexuality … Continue reading

Posted in Interview, Research, Sexual normativity | Tagged , , , | 8 Comments

Challenges faced by asexual spectrum survivors of sexual violence (part 2)

Trigger warnings: If you have any sort of sexual violence-related trigger, you should probably skip this post.  Specific triggers in this post for rape, sexual assault, child molestation, invalidation of both sexual orientation and lived experiences, sexuality policing, coercion (if you … Continue reading

Posted in Intersectionality, Misconceptions, Sexual normativity | Tagged , | 9 Comments

Challenges faced by asexual spectrum survivors of sexual violence (part 1)

Trigger warnings: If you have any sort of sexual violence-related trigger, you might want to skip this post.  Specific triggers in this post for rape, sexual assault, child molestation, corrective rape, invalidation of both sexual orientation and lived experiences, victim-blaming to … Continue reading

Posted in Intersectionality, Misconceptions, Sexual normativity | Tagged , | 17 Comments

Sex isn’t always good

This post was written for the June 2013 Carnival of Aces.  The topic of this month’s carnival is “sex positivity.” Trigger/content warnings: rape, sexual assault, coercion in relationships If you’ve been reading my blog in the past year, you probably know that … Continue reading

Posted in asexual politics, Sexual normativity | 7 Comments

The Freedom Not To Be Sexual

When I’m talking about asexuality, I love to say that it complicates things. And I mean it as a compliment. The idea that asexuality forces us to rethink some of our most basic assumptions about sexuality is a real delight … Continue reading

Posted in Sexual normativity | Tagged , , | 7 Comments

The Two Meanings of « Sex-positivity »

I’m writing it on and on : I’m asexual and sex-positive. Even AVA, our French organization, is sex-positive. And I surely don’t want anybody to think otherwise. I don’t want anybody to believe that I have anything but respect for the … Continue reading

Posted in Sexual normativity | Tagged , , , , | 7 Comments

What’s the deal with the Japanese “herbivore men”?

One day, when I’d been in Japan for about a week and a half, I was sitting at my kitchen table, eating dinner, while my Japanese roommate (who I’ll call H) and her (Japanese) guy friend (who I’ll call J) … Continue reading

Posted in Sexual normativity | Tagged | 32 Comments

Don’t yum my yuck, or being respectful of sex repulsed people is a pretty cool thing to do

The Asexual Agenda is adding new writers!  Welcome Queenie.  Queenie is graduate student in the U.S. studying Japanese religion.  She is asexual and in a long-term romantic relationship with another ace.  She also blogs over at Concept Awesome.  She is never … Continue reading

Posted in Sexual normativity | 8 Comments