Category Archives: Relationships

In which I get married

Posted on January 4, 2020 by

Part 1: In which I have a cough I graduated a couple years ago. I wrote a dissertation about time-resolved experiments on high-temperature superconductors. I am done with physics. I am switching careers. Throughout my PhD, I suffered from long-lived … Continue reading →

Posted in Articles, greyromanticism, personal experience, Relationships | 5 Comments

When unimportant relationships are important

Posted on May 20, 2019 by

Recently, I wrote about my experience not forming close friendships. That’s not strictly speaking true–sometimes I do form some close friendships, but I tend to be uncommitted to them, and I often value friend networks over individual friendships. Now I’d … Continue reading →

Posted in Articles, Modeling, Relationships | 1 Comment

I don’t make close friends

Posted on May 13, 2019 by

What is a friend? In ace communities, most of the time when we’re talking about friendships, it’s in order to differentiate it from other kinds of relationships, such as romantic or queerplatonic relationships. Of course, this puts a strong emphasis … Continue reading →

Posted in Articles, personal experience, Relationships | 11 Comments

I’m not enthusiastic about enthusiastic consent

Posted on March 5, 2019 by

This is an article I’m cross-posting from my own blog.  I wrote it with allo audiences in mind, but decided it’s good here too. In my guide to sexual violence terminology, I mention that “enthusiastic consent” is an unpopular model … Continue reading →

Posted in Articles, Relationships, sex-favorable | 14 Comments

Being grayromantic and not talking about it

Posted on February 14, 2019 by

This was written for this month’s blogging carnival on the theme of “The relationship between the aro and ace communities“.  Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week is also next week. Some time last year, I mentioned offhand to my then-fiance that I … Continue reading →

Posted in Articles, asexual identity, Gray-A, greyromanticism, Relationships | 25 Comments

Once You Get What You Want…

Posted on September 23, 2018 by

One reason I have taken an active role in the asexual community is because I want asexuality to “go mainstream.” That is, not only would asexuality have the same visibility as other orientations but also letting people of all orientations … Continue reading →

Posted in aromanticism, Articles, History, Relationships | 4 Comments

Building a Mosaic from a Shattered Future

Posted on April 30, 2018 by

This post is for the April 2018 Carnival of Aces (“All the birds but us…”). Cross-posted to Prismatic Entanglements. Content Note: contains a brief mention of sexual assault, and discussion of the impact of trauma on relationships.

Posted in Articles, Community, greyromanticism, personal experience, Relationships | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Question of the Week: April 10th, 2018.

Posted on April 10, 2018 by

How do you know if you want to be in a relationship with someone? In Siggy’s recent post on gay coming out stories he writes that while crushes are a big part of coming to realize you are gay narratives … Continue reading →

Posted in Question of the Week, Relationships | 5 Comments

Question of the Week: December 5th, 2017.

Posted on December 5, 2017 by

Are you monogamous, polyamorous, nonmonogamous, polyfidelitous, or something else or in between?  My first experience with polyamory was on AVEN almost ten years ago. I was dating an allosexual person and I remember a fellow ace on the forums told … Continue reading →

Posted in Question of the Week, Relationships | Tagged | 26 Comments

On being unrequited

Posted on November 15, 2017 by

Content warnings: mention of suicide in a fictional work, discussion of trauma messing with conceptions of the future and relationships, brief mention of abusive relationships (with no specifics), some crappy statements about the insufficiency of aces in relationships On a completely … Continue reading →

Posted in Articles, Intersectionality, LGBT, personal experience, Relationships | 25 Comments