Category Archives: asexual identity

Question of the Month: November 19th, 2019.

How often do you think or talk about being ace?  Is being ace a daily topic and always on your mind? Is it the primary frame of reference for your identity? Or is it one of many ways you understand … Continue reading

Posted in asexual identity, Question of the Month | 3 Comments

We need to talk about straight aces

I’m continuing my series on “The Discourse”, that big flame war that occurs on Tumblr regarding the inclusion of aces in LGBTQ spaces. I wish to strip away euphemism, so I’m calling it “The Ace Flame War” rather than “The … Continue reading

Posted in Articles, asexual identity, asexual politics, LGBT, romantic orientation | Tagged | 18 Comments

The Biology Definition of Asexuality May Have More Impact on the Sexual Orientation Than We Think

For a long time I assumed there was a chasm between asexuality as a scientific term and as a sexual orientation identity; the words were separate and the gap between them unbreachable. Asexuality meant one thing in biology textbooks and … Continue reading

Posted in Articles, asexual identity, asexual politics, Language, personal experience, sex-favorable | Tagged | 9 Comments

Being grayromantic and not talking about it

This was written for this month’s blogging carnival on the theme of “The relationship between the aro and ace communities“.  Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week is also next week. Some time last year, I mentioned offhand to my then-fiance that I … Continue reading

Posted in Articles, asexual identity, Gray-A, greyromanticism, Relationships | 25 Comments

Asexuality as a hard limit (or: the cat is dead)

Content warnings: discussion of abuse (with a few examples given, including one having to do with food restriction) and boundary violation, discussion of anti-sex-averse sentiment, mention of sexual violence, animal death in the context of a metaphor In the past few … Continue reading

Posted in Articles, asexual identity, asexual politics, personal experience, sex-repulsed | 34 Comments

We Don’t Know if Asexuals Do or Don’t Want to Have Sex Because They Are All Queer Cats

So many people have told me “I could never date an asexual person because they don’t want sex” I’ve lost count. I often hear or see both asexual and allosexual people say aces don’t want to have sex and/or they … Continue reading

Posted in Articles, asexual identity, asexual politics, Community, personal experience | Tagged , , , | 41 Comments

Attraction and emotional granularity

This article was written for the Carnival of Aces themed on “Nuance & Complexity“. It is being cross-posted to my other blog, A Trivial Knot. Asexuality is chiefly about noticing a distinction between the emotions you perceive in other people, … Continue reading

Posted in Articles, asexual identity, Research | 6 Comments