How have medical professionals or therapists handled your being ace?
content warning: discussion of forced sexuality on aces
When I told my family doctor she was unphased and supportive. She buys books that might help her patients and gave me several on being queer in case I found them useful. Years later I still find that a very touching memory.
Therapists largely ignore my asexuality unless I bring it up, which is both good and bad. At different times being ace has been a relatively non-eventful part of my life and at others it was something I needed to discuss but didn’t feel comfortable doing so. It’s been very confusing to experience repulsion, aversion, and non-attraction, while also simultaneously desiring a romantic and sexual relationship. I was sixteen when I first shared that with a therapist and she encouraged me to explore my sexuality in a very heteronormative way, by myself and with a person I had a crush on but was also deeply repulsed by. In a medical sense it must have appeared to my therapist that I wanted something, my repulsion was in the way, and so my repulsion needed to be cured. It turned out my repulsion was partly just who I was and partly a legitimate fear. I walked into and stayed in a situation that was very bad for me because I thought fear and pain was the only way sexuality could be for me until I got over it. That mentality prevented me from realizing I was in legitimate fear and pain. Instead of pushing past or ignoring the repulsion as my therapist encouraged me to do, I needed to listen to it. I am still slowly learning to distinguish between “normal Talia” levels of aversion I want to work with and repulsion that indicates I do not want to be with this person.