Question of the Week: September 26th, 2017.

What do you wish more people would ask you about being ace?

What do you wish friends would ask you? Strangers? Maybe people on The Asexual Agenda?

cw: for invalidating ace identity

I’d like if people asked what asexuality meant to me instead of just assuming they know what it is (they usually don’t).

It would also be nice if they asked if there was anything they could do to be more accepting. It sucks to put minority people on the spot to speak on behalf of all people of a certain group, but you can also do this tactfully to ask what can I do to make you, as an individual, feel more comfortable? I would have loved if one of my last potential-dates did this when I said I don’t experience sexual attraction instead of telling me he wanted to test my hypothesis. Seriously?!

About Talia

Talia is an asexual, nonbinary, vegan-feminist that drinks a lot of coffee and stays up very late playing Blizzard video games and writing fiction. They are working on a PhD in Environmental Studies where they think a lot about oppression as intersectional and impacting identities differentially. Talia has a particular fondness for asexuality, fandom, and Critical Animal Studies. Their personal blog is
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2 Responses to Question of the Week: September 26th, 2017.

  1. Rivers says:

    Definitely wish people would ask more about how I personally experience it, especially people in my close circles. In general, I’ve actually not had that much Q and A, it’s just “btw I’m asexual, and that means I don’t experience sexual attraction”. Most of the time, people have not asked me for any more info (I have been very selective with who I come out to and most of them were accepting), which is okay if it’s not someone I spend much time with, but there have been a few hiccups with my friends over things they could have easily known if they had actually asked.

    • Rachel says:

      That’s been pretty much my experience. I’m happy to share the nuances of how I experience aromanticism and asexuality, but I’m only out to a select few people and even fewer of them are invested enough in activism to really be interested/receptive.

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