Question of the Week: July 21st, 2015

What have other people said or done that makes you feel comfortable as an ace person? If you don’t have any examples from personal experience, what would you want to hear?

The queer group at a university I went to proposed a “no sex night” event for ace people. I was really excited that they made an event to show they had ace people in mind and even more excited when everyone at the ace hangout agreed that the no sex night shouldn’t be described as just for ace people. Some ace people wouldn’t want to go and some people who weren’t ace would. I felt comfortable in a space where asexuality mattered and everyone seemed to understand that asexuality shouldn’t always be synonymous with no sex and allosexuality with sex.

About Talia

Talia is an asexual, nonbinary, vegan-feminist that drinks a lot of coffee and stays up very late playing Blizzard video games and writing fiction. They are working on a PhD in Environmental Studies where they think a lot about oppression as intersectional and impacting identities differentially. Talia has a particular fondness for asexuality, fandom, and Critical Animal Studies. Their personal blog is
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4 Responses to Question of the Week: July 21st, 2015

  1. I think any time I am asked genuine questions from an interested and accepted person about what it means to be asexual, I feel comfortable.

    • luvtheheaven says:

      Me too. 😉 If I come out as asexual, or talk about something specific related to asexuality, I really feel more comfortable with questions from someone who believes me and wants to make sure they properly understand what it means to me than if someone simply accepts whatever simplified/summarized thing I’ve just said with no questions. I need the chance to expand and really have a conversation about it or else I’m not going to be comfortable.

  2. Writer Ace says:

    When I came out to my brother, he went “two of my friends from school are asexual” and then we just started talking about it. He wasn’t at all judgmental or anything, and he validated my experienced and asked me about it.

  3. Carmilla DeWinter says:

    Friend of mine: “Eh, cool.” Otherwise I’m seconding the first couple replies: Respectful questions are always a plus.

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