Question of the week: February 3rd, 2015

What is your relationship to alcohol?

I drink alcohol in moderate quantities, though never really enough to qualify as drunk anymore.  Let’s be frank though.  I picked up drinking from the dominant queer community.  The briefest glance at any public health research shows that queer people are more likely to suffer from alcoholism than the general population.  While I wouldn’t problematize alcohol in general, alcoholism is a very real health concern.

One supposed explanation for the higher rates of alcoholism is that queer people experience so much rejection from society and relatives that many turn to alcohol.  On the other hand, this applies to aces as well, who are stereotypically straight-edge.

About Siggy

Siggy is an ace activist based in the U.S. He is gay gray-A, and has a Ph.D. in physics. He has another blog where he also talks about math, philosophy, godlessness, and social criticism. His other hobbies include board games and origami.
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39 Responses to Question of the week: February 3rd, 2015

  1. luvtheheaven says:

    I certainly fit the “straight-edge” ace stereotype, as do many of the aces (although certainly not all of them) in the ace-meetup group I’ve been attending for the past few months. I wrote about my relationship to alcohol here: and here: And my relatonship with it has not chanced since May 1st when I published those posts, either. 😛 I think I have 100% avoided tasting even a sip of alcohol since quite a bit before writing those posts. I’m simply not a drinker, not even in small quantities.

  2. Liz says:

    I really like trying out different beers and cocktails, but I hate the idea of being drunk. It frustrates me when I’m trying to enjoy a drink and I start feeling a little buzzed. I’ve never gone beyond that point and I never want to. The idea of getting intoxicated through any means is horribly upsetting to me. I would rather have a cold for two weeks than be drunk for one night.

    It really bothers me when people talk about getting drunk. I think it’s messed up that it’s so normalized in our culture to drink when you feel bad (“I need a frigging drink”, that kind of gag). I try to tell myself not to be so judgmental, especially since I know there are people who don’t understand why I would drink even one beer, but deep inside I do judge people for drinking to the point of inebriation. In my defense, the majority of the people I know who get drunk have suffered some consequence of it, whether it’s something small like getting a big scrape, being too drunk to clean it and bandage it, and having to wait weeks for it to heal, or something big like driving drunk.

    • Aqua says:

      That’s almost exactly how I feel too! I like trying different drinks, but I don’t mind being buzzed. I’m okay with that, but I don’t want to get drunk. I’ve had coworkers talk about how they drunk so much that they lost consciousness, or forgot what happened, and I just can’t understand why they wanted to do that, despite all the risk for negative consequences.

  3. Sciatrix says:

    I am an occasional drinker, particularly socially. The primary reason I don’t drink more frequently is that I don’t care for either wine or beer, but I do like the taste of hard liquor–but liquor (and mixed drinks) are more expensive and less often available socially. Given the choice between beer or wine and soft drinks, I’ll generally go for the soft drink every time. (This has occasionally lead to amusing incidents, like a friend at a party crowing about how she ‘actually got Sci to drink whiskey!’ when actually I’m a huge fan of good whiskey and perk up pretty much every time it goes on offer.) I do have a history of alcoholism in my family and I nearly always have to drive home from parties, so I have a more-or-less permanent two-drink limit. That’s been the case since I started drinking in college, too.

    Regarding ace stereotypes of being straight edge, I think that’s a slightly self-fulfilling stereotype. I’ve definitely noticed ace groups or conversations where I felt weird expressing my taste for an occasional drink, or at least in a distinct minority. I suspect this is more linked to general nerd distaste for bars than asexuality specifically, though.

    • Siggy says:

      Most of my nerd (grad student) friends drink. They’re the primary reason I switched from hard liquor (popular among my queer undergrad friends) to beer. Is this not true for you?

      • Sciatrix says:

        No, that’s actually definitely true! Pretty much all of my grad student friends drink to some extent, and most of the drinking I do around people is done around grad students these days. (Actually, the first time I ever got drunk was at a scientific conference at the instigation of my then-PI–I swear this was less sketchy than it sounds.) But I wasn’t thinking of my grad student friends when I mentioned nerd culture, I was thinking of nerd friends I met through online fandom or who are deeply into gaming or anime or things like that. My experience is that people who do a significant amount of their socializing online are more likely to be disdainful of alcohol to some extent than people who do most of their socializing in person. It may be an extrovert/introvert thing, I dunno.

    • Elizabeth says:

      I agree that it seems somewhat of a self-fulfilling stereotype–I’ve also felt weird for talking about drugs of any kind in ace spaces sometimes, which kind of caused me to just not talk about it. But maybe those conversations would be beneficial specifically because they’re uncomfortable?

  4. I don’t drink alcohol at all, never have, and don’t plan to start. Definitely straight-edge here.

  5. Elizabeth says:

    I’m not exactly a teetotaler and definitely NOT straight-edge… but alcohol is just not my drug of choice. Every so often I will have a drink, but… it just doesn’t seem to do much for me other than make my face feel warm. In order to feel actually affected by it besides that, I have to drink a LOT more than I’m comfortable with.

    I was very resistant to trying it, because of a history of alcoholism in my family. When I studied abroad in Japan, there was an INSANE amount of additional peer pressure (and the legal drinking age was 20 there, so I could suddenly no longer use the excuse that I’m underage), so I had some pretty mild fruity drinks there. They were very tastey, but… yeah, didn’t really feel all that affected by it. Although I did enjoy pretend drunk-text pranking a friend.

    When I turned 21, I had to test out how it would affect me by myself before I was comfortable drinking around friends. Then I did a bit of drinking with friends for a while, until they decided to stop inviting me to hang out with them without any explanation given (I found out later it was entirely because I had started dating someone, and one now-ex friend strongly disliked my partner, and also just assumed I would never go hang out with them without inviting her, so she started throwing a fit whenever other friends wanted to invite me). After that I stopped drinking, because I didn’t see any reason to… but if I’m in a situation where I can try a new kind of drink, I might do it. I usually don’t like them, though.

    I don’t really think it’s the case that alcohol just doesn’t affect me in the same way that it affects most people, however. I could get drunk if I wanted… but I’d have to drink so much more, comparatively, than I would have to toke to get high, that it’s just not worth it. And weed is overall much more pleasant, and much less dangerous–plus it’s very good treatment for PTSD, and I can obtain it legally.

    I’ve also done mushrooms. And because of dumb stereotypes, nobody would ever suspect that I’d ever have tried that in my life (most people don’t even think I’d have ever tried weed, much less have a favorite strain and know how to bake magically), which just makes me laugh.

  6. Victrix says:

    I rarely drink and will only drink if I actually will really enjoy the drink. I’ve got arthritis and alcohol can be one ofthe things that can cause it to flare up. Gets frustrating when people keep assuming you will drink.

  7. Foxnamed says:

    Hi Siggy! So I’ve been around for a year and don’t post often, but this question was just too good and relevant to let pass.

    I fall on the asexual spectrum where “asexual is a useful concept.” I still occasionally experience sexual and romantic attraction, or curiosity, or desire, but I can’t parse them in a 100% allo way. For this reason, many of the concepts and theories introduced by the asexual community resonate with me very, very deeply. If we need to label me, I’d probably fall under WTF?!romantic/sexual.

    With all these inconsistent and constantly fluctuating feelings, it’s very hard to connect with people who have more “normal” attitudes towards sex, sexuality, and romantic/sexual relationships, because I can’t explain myself or trust them to leave my sexuality be. At the same time, I’m a fiercely loving and very physical, sensual person.

    I also have a deep personal and cultural history with alcohol that I haven’t examined, constantly walking the line between “Russian” and “college kid” and “part-time alcoholic.”

    Thus, the tension between being sensual/physical/fiercely loving and sex-negative, possibly grey-ace, leads me to use the comfortable familiarity of alcohol as a way to reconcile my psychological reality and my physical curiosity. I use drunkenness as an excuse to do things that I might otherwise find morally or otherwise objectionable. Like randomly kissing people, or aggressively using my looks in a sexual way, or hitting on all of my friends.

    I’m filled with moral dread as and after I do these things, which leads to hangxiety which is just a bundle of fun, and I often question the health of my drinking habits because of the way I act when I’m intoxicated (“But you’re Russian,” my brain objects, “But you’re in college.”).

    I have a lot more feelings that I’m having trouble articulating, but this is as much as I can muster together right now. I’d love to know if more people find the relationship between alcohol and sexual expression this complicated!

    • Siggy says:

      I think many people use drunkenness as an excuse to do things they either find morally objectionable or socially unacceptable while sober. But I think it’s brave and self-aware to acknowledge that you yourself do it.

      Hell, I did it too, when I first started drinking. I had just admitted that I was asexual (these being the days before I ID’d as gray-A), but I wasn’t happy with it. I used alcohol to explore the possibility (which I wanted really badly) that I wasn’t ace. And I used it to break out of my identity/reputation as kind of a straight-edge person who just never talks about anything sex-related.

      It’s really hard to make a moral judgment about that kind of thing. I did a few things that I really regretted, and in some ways it was about me being unable to accept who I was. On the other hand, my straight-edge identity was really becoming non-functional, as it wasn’t allowing me to talk about my sexuality when I really needed to.

      • Foxnamed says:

        (wow it’s been seventy years)

        Thank you so much for your reply! Your last paragraph really struck home:

        “It’s really hard to make a moral judgment about that kind of thing. I did a few things that I really regretted, and in some ways it was about me being unable to accept who I was. On the other hand, my straight-edge identity was really becoming non-functional, as it wasn’t allowing me to talk about my sexuality when I really needed to.”

        It’s definitely something about having to push yourself to shed your previous selves in an attempt to accept your new self. And alcohols is a ready-made, socially acceptable way to do it. But it’s a myth because the changes it makes in your behavior aren’t self-aware change, so you can’t learn from them.

        Anyways, thank you for your kind message. My New Year’s resolution was actually to drink less as a social function, and your comments about bravery are really inspiring me to move forward with wholesomeness.

  8. elainexe says:

    I don’t drink. When I was at my lowest of depressive lows, I experimented with alcohol. Once things got better, I went back to only mildly alcoholic fruity drinks (and then nothing after I became Muslim).
    However, there are many, many other bad habits out there acquired as a reaction to life’s difficulties. Such as extreme multitasking: if I do enough things at once, I don’t have to have full consciousness for any one of them. Overeating….that one’s self-explanatory. Self-harm…..well, that one’s not so much a problem anymore. I could probably go on if I thought about it more, but I’m sure that’s enough.
    I guess alcoholism is an easy bad habit to ask for, but I just wonder what kind of picture would be painted if we could see a fuller range of habits between queer and non-queer populations.

  9. gamerchick02 says:

    (Lurker, first time commenter; I’ve been reading for about… oh… a year maybe? I dunno but either way, I’m fairly new.)

    I don’t drink much. I like the taste of good microbrews or a good whiskey.

    I’m at the point where I don’t want to drink to get drunk but I do enjoy a good drink every once in awhile. I’m also 33 so the urge to get “wasted” has passed. I’m also making enough money now that I can drink what I want and not what others are providing to me. It’s nice.

    I guess I’m saying that I drink for the taste and not the effect, if that makes sense.

    Great question!


  10. Brin says:

    On my 19th birthday (local drinking age), I had a grasshopper, the idea being that the mint and cocoa flavourings would drown out the taste of the alcohol. They didn’t, at least not enough, and I was unable to choke it down fast enough to feel anything.

    A few months later, I mentioned this at a party (not that kind of party; most of the guests were in their forties and fifties, and both of my parents were among them) and they were surprised I hadn’t felt anything, even going as slow as I had. Turns out, ~5oz of 7.5% ABV over the course of 50 minutes is supposed to be enough for a mild buzz.

    (In hindsight, I suppose it’s possible it might have caused feelings of heat. I had a cold at the time, so I might not have noticed something like that.)

    On my 21st birthday, I asked the waiter at the little Italian place if they had any cocktails, so that I could honour (honor?) my American heritage. All they had was wine and beer, and I doubted I would be able to tolerate either of those, so I just skipped the 21st-birthday ritual.

    My family did honor our American heritage by holding a Thanksgiving dinner on the fourth Thursday of November. I shared some hard cider with my mother. Well, I tried to: the taste was so painful I couldn’t finish the half-glass she’d poured me.

    Aside from the occasional sip of New Year’s champagne as a child, this is the sum total of my experience with alcohol. I don’t intend to bother with further experimentation.

  11. Hibari says:

    The only times I drank were before I was 21, which I always found kind of ironic. I made the decision to be straight-edge because I wanted to stop getting caught up in the idea that drinking would make me rebellious or more fun. I also recognized that I was using alcohol as a weird form of stress relief. Even though it didn’t work (my anxiety and insomnia went up), I didn’t want to risk getting addicted. These days I’m very hardlined against alcohol because I’ve only seen it cause problems among with friends and with my partner and it frustrates me that people only accept the medical reason for why I’m straight-edge.

  12. I drink sometimes, usually in fairly small amounts, although that depends on the social situation. I didn’t drink at all (barring the occasional sip of my mother’s wine) until I was 19 or 20, and I was generally pretty cautious with it at first. To this day I dislike drinking in large groups where I don’t know everyone, but if I’m in a more comfortable social situation, my guard comes down a bit.

    I’m still struggling with my feelings about alcohol, to be honest. I know that I sometimes use it as a way of escaping feelings of self-consciousness, anxiety, or loneliness. Recognizing that made me profoundly uncomfortable. I don’t like the thought of coping with alcohol, because it sounds like the first step on the path to addiction. On the other hand, sometimes I’m just genuinely enjoying the taste of a great whiskey or the way a glass of wine complements my dinner! It’s hard to entirely separate out my motivations for drinking. Mostly, I wish I were the kind of person who didn’t worry so much.

  13. epochryphal says:

    [cw: internalized compulsory sexuality and sexual coercion]

    I am just now coming to the conclusion that I need to stop drinking.

    I’ve used alcohol, and talked about using alcohol, as a way to bypass my own consent. To stop having boundaries and worrying, especially about sex. I defended my right to do this vehemently, and was adamantly against “non-sober can never be consent.”

    Now, that’s changing.

    As I recognize that I have certain boundaries (eg being paper) and needs (eg being autistic), and am doing somatic therapy and contacting my emotions and becoming less frustrated with not understanding myself…I am less likely to turn to alcohol to help me feel, to help me circumvent my brain, to push past virginity/boundaries and attempt to “fix” myself and cleanse my palate of a bad taste by forcing a new ‘better’ experience.

    I really shouldn’t drink with my meds anyway, and at this point I associate it with self-harm (and sex as self-harm). It’s damn hard to stop even though I never did much consistently and from the outside it wouldn’t look like an issue. Still figuring out taste and exceptions versus teetotaler absolutism.

    Funny, I never drank when I was immersed in drunk queer culture, only after I left and thought it’d be safer because smaller groups / less club-like settings. Nah. Just meant I missed out on the socially-acceptable learning-curve age (yayyy developmental delay).

  14. Silvermoon says:

    I drink alcohol sometimes, but rarely, because I’m not often in social situations involving alcohol (and in most of those it’s beer or wine so ick). The most I’ve had in one evening is a ginger beer and a couple of shots, and that wasn’t enough for me to feel tips.
    Most people assume that I’m a straight-edge no-alcohol type but it’s not the case- just the circumstance.

  15. queenieofaces says:

    I don’t drink; I have alcoholism on both sides of my family and can’t mix alcohol with meds anyway. Plus, drunk people tend to make me really anxious, which makes socializing around alcohol pretty fraught for me.

    Actually, navigating alcohol has been a lot less fraught for me in Japan than in the States, despite what an intense drinking culture Japan has. I’ve been out drinking (oolong or non-alcoholic cocktails for me) probably ten times as often in Japan than in the States. Part of that is that in Japan I tell people that I have an allergy to alcohol and they tend not to question or pressure me at all, and part of that is that I have a couple of Japanese friends who don’t or can’t drink or will have one alcoholic drink and then have tea for the rest of the night. But maybe some of that is also the demographics of who I go out drinking with–my last izakaya experience was with a priest in her mid-40s, a parishioner from the shrine, and the parishioner’s 6 -year-old son.

    • Siggy says:

      Ah yes, Asian glow. Lots of people on the Chinese side of the family have allergic reactions to alcohol. I have a reaction too, but at least my face doesn’t itch like it does for others. It’s a major damper on any social pressure to drink.

      Some white people don’t seem to realize that this actually lowers my alcohol tolerance. I’m not sure what to say when people start doing the alcohol tolerance masculinity contest thing. It’s just a tiny bit racist?

    • Elizabeth says:

      It’s worth noting that my experience in Japan largely had to do with pressure coming from other college-aged gaijin–mostly Americans. My perpetrator (Japanese-American, raised in the U.S.) was usually among them and he was by far the worst offender.

      So yeah, the demographic does make a big difference. At izakayas I generally found myself in mixed groups of gaijin (mostly American and Korean) and Japanese. When I hung out with just Japanese people, we did something other than go to izakayas.

      • queenieofaces says:

        Oh, that makes sense. I honestly avoid drinking with gaijin unless they’re people I already know–when I lived in an international student dorm, I avoided any sort of drinking activity like the plague. The fact that I didn’t start spending time in Japan until I could speak the language relatively well probably helped with that endeavor; since I’ve never had the choice of ONLY socializing with English-speakers, I can avoid a lot of the “we’re 20 and can drink as much as we want and then play the gaijin card when we start irritating everyone” crowd.

  16. maralaurey says:

    (cw: implied sexual assault(?))

    I turned 18 (legal drinking age in my part of the world) about six months ago, and I’ve had maybe two glasses of cider and that’s it. I wouldn’t say I was a teetotaler or anything, because if I fancied something like a cider or wanted to try something else then I would, but I’ve decided that I’m not going to be a regular drinker. There’s a few different reasons for it (expense, not the biggest fan of the taste/smell, etc), but mainly I just thought about it and honestly had no idea why anyone would want to be drunk. The only reason I can think of is that (as I found out last week) it’s pretty boring being the only sober one at the party, but surely the hang-over is worse than the peer pressure?

    I was talking to someone about not drinking, actually, and they suggested that I didn’t understand it because I liked being in control, while people that drink don’t mind as long as they’re having a good time. I think that might partially be correct, but I think the main reason I don’t understand it is that I don’t want to be out of control in a drinking environment. Maybe PSHE lessons have taught me too well or maybe it’s my asexuality and sex-repulsion shining through, but the idea of being drunk where there are lowered inhibitions and people out on the pull and things like that makes me incredibly uncomfortable. At a house party I went to last week, I had one friend who was followed all around the house all night by a drunk guy, and some of the slightly less tipsy guests basically had to corral the guy upstairs away from her, and I would really really dislike being in her position. So that might be the reason that I don’t drink. I also think that I like being contrary, though — the more people try to peer-pressure me into drinking (ironically it’s usually my family or family friends that do this) the more likely I am to not touch a drop.

    • I’m glad you brought up the role of asexuality and sex aversion because I suspect that’s a major factor in why I not only don’t drink but don’t feel comfortable about the idea of drinking or being in places where people are drinking.

  17. luvtheheaven says:

    Moderator’s note: This was in reply to another comment which was deleted by request.

    “Straight-edge” is defined here:
    as… “Abstaining from alcohol, tobacco, and drugs.” – according to the 2011 American Heritage Dictionary.

    According to another dictionary, though, cited lower down on that same “the free dictionary” page, originating around 1980-1985, the term meant ” advocating abstinence from alcohol, cigarettes, drugs, and sex and sometimes advocating vegetarianism.”

    And also on that page, the Collins English Dictionary, as early as 1998 was defining it as “not indulging in any kind of drug-taking or sexual activities”.

    I haven’t heard the term much in my life, I think the first time I heard it was at an ace-meetup actually where one of the organizers mentioned that our group seemed particularly “Straight-edge”.

  18. AceAdmiral says:

    I don’t drink because I don’t like the taste (I don’t cook with any alcohol other than mild rice wine, either), and because I’d rather spend the money on one of my actual vices. A lot of people have trouble when I put up my boundaries about that, so it’s incidetally often a good way for me to gauge how safe a person is to come out to.

    I agree that teetotaling a serious barrier to entry into queer space (not that there are any queer female spaces anymore since they keep closing, but). I’m blessed to live in an area with a large queer population, but there’s precious little that’s not party/happy hour or support group. Everyone was friendly and I got plenty of invitations to go to this party or that when I tried to enter the community through the support group route. I blame my persistent inability to make queer friends partially on how alcohol-dominated queer space is, although there are other things tangled up in the atmosphere of those spaces, too, that make it unfriendly to aces, so it’s not purely the presence of alcohol that’s the problem.

    I’m getting the sense, though, that people are hungry for non-alcoholic spaces and, more importantly, organizing some. (Particularly, I have seen a great thirst for knitting circles.) Because, yeah, a lot of us happen to be teetotaling tea-drinkers, but we’re not the only ones being left in the cold by the current set up (youth, people recovering from drinking problems, people with religious/moral objections, etc. etc.). To be honest, I think I would feel safer as an asexual person being in, you know, a knitting circle, because it would have the intimacy of the support group without my complete inability to contribute anything because my problems and the majority’s problems are different, and there would be no expectation to drink.

    • Ace in Translation says:

      I would be so up for a knitting circle (hoping that this crochet geek is welcome too…). And I agree with the difficulty of getting into the queer community if you’re not the drinking/partying type. I’m not a fan of drinking, nor a fan of big parties/clubbing in general. A tea-drinking gathering with some crafty stuff thrown in sounds perfect!

  19. I don’t drink. Never have, never will. Nothing about it seems appealing to me in any way.

    I have, however, noticed a bit of a parallel in how people treat my lack of interest in drinking and my lack of interest in sex. There’s the same sort of “Everyone does it, why don’t you?”, “You just haven’t had the right kind!”, “Try it, you’ll like it!”, “We just need to get you drunk/laid!” sorts of comments that get thrown around. Sometimes people assume that I have some sort of moral objection to it, and so they’ll tread lightly around the topic. In fact, not drinking often gets a stronger reaction than not being married/dating/etc., probably because I’m so frequently forced to explicitly state that I don’t drink.

    • And at work, it really bothers me how many company events are dominated by alcohol. (Doesn’t help that the party planning commission is made up of boozehounds…) The company Christmas party was at a bar and they gave away bottles of wine and other alcohol as random prizes. Today, my team was given the option between having a team event at a bar or at a different bar. I’ve just stopped going entirely, because every time it ends up being an uncomfortable situation where someone will make a comment about how I’m not drinking, and why don’t you drink, and you should try this, and one day we’re going to get you to drink something and NO JUST STOP.

      It also doesn’t help that I’m also not a big fan of eating in general…

      • Siggy says:

        In my personal experience, I see a lot of social pressure to drink coming from undergrads, and basically none coming from grad students or older people. So I kind of associate the attitude with immature undergrads. Hearing about pressure among your coworkers makes me sad. If it helps, you can tell them they made someone on the internet sad.

        • queenieofaces says:

          I’ve had the opposite experience–social drinking is MUCH more of a thing among grad than undergrad friends for me. I had a lot of non-drinking friends in undergrad, whereas I think I’m the only non-drinker in my grad group. There was a period of about a year and a half where I pretty much didn’t socialize with folks in my department after school hours ’cause it was just drinking parties. I wonder how much of that is a departmental thing (most of my friends in undergrad were in STEM whereas my department is humanities) and how much is cultural (we’re an East Asian studies department, so pretty much everyone spends a large chunk of their time in heavy drinking cultures).

  20. Ace in Translation says:

    Another ace who’s not a big drinker. I only drink very very occasionally. I don’t like the taste of most alcoholic drinks and I hate the feeling of being tipsy (never been drunk). So the situation has to be that there’s a drink available that I happen to like and there isn’t anything better on offer. And there usually is something better on offer (people who know me, know that I live on a diet of tea and ice tea).

    I tend to avoid parties and settings where the whole point is to drink and get drunk (what’s the point in being bored while the rest is having a good time?), and in other settings people are generally pretty good about it. Either that, or I’m totally oblivious to the pressure they try to put on me, haha! At least the people I’m usually with are always ok with me not drinking. For them, it’s a complete non-issue. If I do get a comment of “omg you ordered a soda”/”why no beer?”, it’s from people who don’t know me.

    The only thing I don’t like is the reaction you get when you do decide to take a glass of wine. People react like it’s a huge deal. How would you feel if I’d react to you deciding to drink ice tea even though I never saw you drinking it before with “omg you want Ice Tea?! Are you sure?! Omg, did you hear they want ICE TEA?!”

  21. My alcohol consumption is rare because I don’t like the feeling of being buzzed/tipsy. I do like certain creamy liquors, but I’m a supertaster, so most alcoholic beverages (especially beer and wine) taste awful to me.

  22. Hollis says:

    Wow, sounds like I’m in the minority here as a moderate drinker. I enjoy cider and wine and some beer and really, really like whiskey and rum. I enjoy getting mildly buzzed to slightly tipsy once in a while. That said, I’m also a college student and also a member of a community where any event involves alcohol and I know a grand total of one person who doesn’t drink*. People talk about alcoholism in the queer community, but like, it pales in comparison to whitewater folks.

    That said, I definitely drink less than most of the people I hang out with who drink. I drink enough that I can’t/shouldn’t be driving afterwards (unless planning on driving), but it’s still less than everyone else pretty consistently.

    And regarding other drugs, I’m more straightedge than most of my non-college friends (and I massively DO NOT approve of some of my friends’ antics because guys, whitewater + hallucinogens shouldn’t be mixed because that’s how people die I don’t care if you’ve been doing this since before I was born it’s still a bad idea), and probably at a similar level to most of my college friends, where weed occasionally is a thing, but like, ehhhh, whatever.

    *Well, he drinks NA beer.

  23. Pingback: The Asexual Community & Veg*n Communities, Part 1 | The Notes Which Do Not Fit

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