Question of the Week: April 23rd, 2013

This is the Question of the Week, a way to stimulate conversation.  It occurs every Tuesday.

How do you feel about parties?  What sort of thing do you imagine when I say “party”, and is it the kind of thing you enjoy?

I tend to think of house parties.  The kind with hors d’oeuvres, moderate amounts of alcohol, and lots of people who I will likely never see again.  I generally find them enjoyable, in moderate quantities.  If I stay too long I get bored though.

About Siggy

Siggy is a physics grad student in the U.S. He is gay gray-A, and makes amateur attempts at asexual activism. His interests include godlessness, scientific skepticism, and math. While not working or blogging, he plays video and board games with his boyfriend, and folds colored squares.
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9 Responses to Question of the Week: April 23rd, 2013

  1. Sorcha says:

    I think of house parties too. The kind where there is loud music, and alcohol, and way too many people for my comfort. They make me anxious and uncomfortable and I don’t want to go to them and will do pretty much anything to avoid it, up to and including flat-out lying.

    Yeah, I’m an introvert and the thought of going to a party is not a pleasant one.

    • Vivi says:

      Seconded, all of it. Unfortunately, I’ve got a neighbor who throws these kinds of parties a few times a year. In his garden. Until 4 AM. And usually in the summer, when I can’t sleep without my windows open to let the day’s heat out.

      I did like the sort of get together my circle of friends in highschool used to do for birthdays – 5 to 8 people, no alcohol (it would be legal in my country, but half of my friends were tee-totalers and the rest didn’t care much one way or the other), fingerfood, cake, and board games. And no unwanted flirting, inappropriate touching, or sneeking off in pairs into other rooms, even after some of them had taken to bringing their boyfriends. (This probably explains why I didn’t really suspect anything was different about my sexuality until I was about 21.)
      But that’s not the image that comes to mind when I hear the word “party”.

      Aside from the ‘house party’ type, I think of big street festivals like the Love Parade, Christopher Street Day (German version of Gay Pride parade) or the Berlin’s Carnival of Cultures, as well as the multiple-day rock and metal festivals that I am told are much like one big party. I kind of want to go to one of those someday – at least Wacken Open Air is renowed to be beer-soaked and loud but very peaceful and safe – but I wouldn’t want to go alone and it would probably be very exhausting.

    • ace-muslim says:

      This is exactly what I was thinking too. As an introvert, I would much rather spend time with one or two people I know really well, or at home doing something I enjoy.

  2. Sciatrix says:

    I also think of house parties, although in my case I’m likely to assume that I do actually know most of the people there. (I also don’t default to assuming loud music–most of the parties I’ve been to have featured no music whatsoever.)

    I like a good house party once in a while; it’s a good occasion to chat and socialize a little more intensively than I’m used to. I’m usually exhausted afterwards rather than bored, though, and that’s the yardstick I use to determine when it’s time to leave.

  3. Seth says:

    I think of a fighter, a rogue, a wizard, and a cleric. Definitely to sort of thing I enjoy.

    In all seriousness though, I don’t think I have a clear concept of what a generic party looks like. What I do know is that if I don’t know many of the guests, it’s going to be uninteresting and socially awkward for me.

  4. Twi says:

    I think of two types of parties: there are those stereotypical college parties with far too much alcohol, people playing pong, loud music, and a crowd as well as the parties that are friends getting together to have dinner and celebrate someone’s birthday or special event or something.
    I am a fan of parties so long as I know the majority of people without there being a huge crowd at either type.
    Now, I don’t do too much of the stereotypical college partying, as it’s too much work (and also I like having a reasonable GPA and not failing things), but parties with my team or a capella group prove to be fun.
    The non-college style parties are generally fun as well, though they can get a bit boring as I’m not always the best conversationalist.

  5. Jillian says:

    I think of a bunch of friends coming over to someone’s house and eating food. There might be music. It might be someone’s birthday. I like parties, but I don’t get to go to them very often. Afterward I always have to be alone for a time to regain my energy.

  6. Eponine says:

    I think of house parties with 20-40 people (I probably won’t go to parties larger than that), most of whom I know, but only their names. There’s a lot of alcohol and small talks (both of which I hate), and some people will get drunk so they have to stay over at the host’s place (but I usually leave much earlier than that point). Generally speaking, I don’t like going to parties.

    The only thing I like about parties is playing games, like Taboo, Apples to Apples, Werewolf, etc. When playing games, I don’t have to think about what to talk about with other people or wandering around the house not knowing whom to talk to.

  7. queenieofaces says:

    When you say “party,” I think frat party. I’ve never been to a frat party (although I have been to college house parties…briefly) but I doubt I would like them. Drunk people make me really nervous, and I don’t like being in crowds, so most parties aren’t real high on my list of enjoyable things to do.

    If you put some sort of descriptor before “party” (like “board game party” or “watch bad kung-fu movies and eat ice cream party”), I’m a lot more likely to enjoy it.

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