Linkspam: May 27th, 2016

Every Friday, we will share links to news, blogs, and anything else we find interesting.  We can’t catch everything, so you are invited to self-promote in the comments!

Ace Blogging

Jo wonders if lack of sexual attraction is the best of way of defining asexuality.

Sara wrote about the ableism embedded in prejudice against asexuals and aromantics.

swankivy wrote about love and intimate nonsexual nonromantic relationships.

Ace Community Activity

redbeardace is compiling a list of ace marching groups for local Pride parades this year.  The most recent version of the list can be found here.  He also posted a list of Pacific Northwest Pride events.

Coyote wants to find LGBT youth shelters that are open to aces.

 

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Question of the Week: May 24th, 2016.

Do you identify with the term ace? Would you use it to describe yourself?

For years I only identified as asexual. Ace was a term I’d picked up from the asexual community and so I associated ace with feeling like a part of that community. For a long time I didn’t feel like I fit into the community and so I resisted seeing myself as ace. I knew being asexual regularly overlapped with being ace, but for me it did not at all. I preferred when academics or organizers used the term asexual over ace because the latter did not include me.

What eventually changed my mind, slowly and subtly, was finding my own place in the wider community. It wasn’t a conscious decision, but over time as my feeling of belonging increased, I started using the term ace more and more. Now in some situations I even prefer to use ace over asexual. I  regularly choose to use the term ace as an act of embracing community.

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Book Review: Rachel Hills, The Sex Myth

There aren’t many books out there that are a) about sex and sexuality, and b) ace-friendly. So when I first came across Australian journalist Rachel Hill’s book The Sex Myth: The Gap Between Our Fantasies and Reality last year, I was pretty excited, but also slightly nervous. (The nervousness I blame on all those anthropology textbooks I had to read for university one semester that told me that sex was inherently what makes us human – and, well, most of what is written about sex in general.)

Turns out that I really didn’t have to worry in this case, because The Sex Myth is one of the most ace-friendly books about sexuality and sexual culture (for lack of a better term) I’ve ever read. So I thought I’d share some of my thoughts on the book here – alongside copious quotes to illustrate why I like this book so much.

The Sex Myth is all about the role that sex plays in our lives and our society – and critiquing the way that sex has become so all-encompassing, so fundamental to our identities and self-worth and ideas of success, that is has become more powerful and more elevated than all other things we do. As Hills puts it:

At the heart of the Sex Myth lies the idea that sex is unlike any other facet of human life: that it is more powerful, more transcendent, and an expression of a more authentic truth than any other activity we engage in. In contemporary Western culture, sex is more than a matter of reproduction, or even recreation. It is the arena in which the self is formed and the ground on which we are presumed to build our most profound intimacies. (p. 35)

Continue reading

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Linkspam: May 20th, 2016

Every Friday, we will share links to news, blogs, and anything else we find interesting.  We can’t catch everything, so you are invited to self-promote in the comments!

Ace Community Activity

The Asexual-Spectrum Professional Network has launched.

Ace Spec Japan is a new LINE group (and WordPress) for asexual spectrum people in Japan.

 

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Question of the Week: May 17th 2016

Do you have many queer and/or ace friends?

I’ve heard several stories about queer/ace people being friends with each other before any of them realize that they’re ace/queer.  It seems that sometimes people who feel outside the norm attract each other, labels or not.

But that’s not my experience.  A few childhood friends have come out as queer or trans, but not that many.  I have many queer friends, but it’s by design, not by accident.  Many years of hanging out in queer and ace spaces has had quite an impact on the demographics of my friends.

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Linkspam: May 13th, 2016

Every Friday, we will share links to news, blogs, and anything else we find interesting.  We can’t catch everything, so you are invited to self-promote in the comments!

Ace Blogging

Sara argues that people of all orientations can choose to which relationships they consent.

News & Outreach

There’s a new senior thesis on asexuality and boundaries in online discourse.

Calls for Participants/Submissions

j.a.m.i.e., an ace/aro zine, is looking for submissions.

Vanessa is looking for people to talk to about aces’ interactions with the health care system.

Posted in Linkspam | 4 Comments

Question of the Week: May 10th 2016.

Are you an introvert or extrovert? Do you find yourself somewhere in the middle or are the terms meaningless to you? 

I’d be curious if there are any links between asexuality and introversion. If so, would that be influenced by the largest ace communities being online? While online communities are important because aces are geographically spread apart, maybe our online communities are also especially supportive for the introverted among us. Does the medium of community we use encourage introverted people to stick around and thus make them more likely to connect with an ace identity?

To be clear by introvert I mean a person who charges themselves by being alone and by extrovert I mean a person who charges themselves by being around others. For example, being an extrovert around lots of stimuli is like being a solar panel on a sunny day. As soon as I put that together I knew that I was an introvert. I recharge best in a bubble bath by myself, with the lights dimmed, but I also really like just being around people and not interacting with them (like working side by side at a coffee shop with a buddy).

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